Interview with Gerald Fierst

Interview with Gerald Fierst

Gerald Fierst has officiated at wedding celebrations, and performed as a storyteller, throughout the United States. He is author of "The Heart of the Wedding", a discussion of wedding ceremonies, marriage, and love in 21st Century America.


What was your path towards publication like?
At one point, I stood in the library and looked at the stacks and thought, “All these people have written books, and some of them have done it more than once.”

It took five years from the first sample chapters to the final release of my book. I kept on looking at my author’s picture and thinking, “Do I still look like that?”

I began thinking I would write a stylebook about flowers and food. Some agents expressed an interest but no one bought. Often, I would receive personal, handwritten note, all turning me down and wishing me luck. Then, an acquaintance who had been a publisher and sold the business asked me to do a favor and drive him to Pennsylvania to pick up a new car he had bought.

On the trip he started to tell me about his new press.

“Want a book?” I asked.

“Sure, send me a proposal and I will show it to my editor.”

So I did.

At first they, too, were going to pass. “This proposal seems more like your second book. We’d prefer you to write something about issues.”

Then they called back to say a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. But by that time I had rethought my proposal and wanted to send the new pitch. They thought this new conceptualization was great and we had a deal. Then I had to write it. Every step was a lesson. You learn how to write a book by writing one. I had written plays and stories but a book needs an arch and a scope that makes you rethink one’s habits.


What was the first market you queried and why did you choose that market?
First market was the agents I found in directories. I figured they would help me get the widest possible range of publishers. In fact, they either passed or thought the book was too slight. Part of my problem was I didn’t know how to pitch what I really could do best. Finally, because a publisher knew me and dialogued, I ended up with a much stronger concept and final book.


What is your biggest obstacle when it comes to pitching yourself as a writer and what steps have you taken to overcome that obstacle?
Pitching is very hard. I like complication. Pitching has to be simple. I try to be unique. Pitching calls for branding and identifying markets. I have learned more about the simple and direct style needed to pitch but I am still learning. You really need a mentor to show you.


Can you tell us a little bit about your latest book?
My latest book, "The Heart of the Wedding", has a lot of practical advice about planning a wedding ceremony, but instead of trying to sell product, as so many books and web sites do, I try to sell an idea.

The words we say are more important than the wine, food or flowers. I give historical context as well as real stories of lovers and their weddings. I discuss the whole concept of marriage in the 21st Century and speak to the debate on marriage in a secular society. Including same-sex weddings, recommitment ceremonies, and partnerships.

"The Heart of the Wedding" is non-fiction. Many of the stories I have published are adaptations of folklore. The Heart of the Wedding uses traditional tales to reveal the transformational power of ceremony and uses folktales to frame the true-life stories that parallel the symbolic traditional material stories.

If you could choose just one thing for your book to accomplish, what would it be?
I would like to change the way people marry in the United States so that the first thing they do after they decide to marry is to speak to a civil celebrant about what kind of ceremony they want and then have the celebration reflect the ceremony.


How do you balance your life as a writer with your duties as a parent or spouse?
I find it hard to work at home and found that I had to go to the library, coffee shop, or the local Christian Science Reading Room (they were great in giving me a quiet comfortable place without any pressure to as to why I was there). When working at home, your family always feels you are available. Phones ring as folks know where you are. You have to stop listening to who is calling and say from this time to that time I am working.


What is your best advice for getting past writer's block?
Set the timer. Sit and write whatever you can that day in that many hours. Two or three hours was often all I could do, but I wouldn’t do anything else but write and if I got a page finished, I was a page closer to my goal.


What was the best writing-related advice you ever received?
The best writing advice I received was to make yourself write every day. Get up, go to work, and do as much as you can. I also enjoyed the person who told me that everyone should do three things in life, Raise a child, Plant a Tree, and Write a Book. And the person who told me “Do one thing every day and soon people will start to respond.”


What do you feel is the single most detrimental thing a writer could do to destroy his/her career as a writer?
Don’t assume that people don’t want to hear from you. Reach out to everyone big and small. Everyone is looking for ideas and everyone who is good appreciates the struggle. When you stop reaching out, you began to atrophy until you just give up. Having a community energizes; No one accomplishes anything if you don’t put yourself out there to be heard.


What’s ahead for your writing?
Right now I hope to increase my work with clients writing their ceremonies, but also begin to find new ways to reach out. I still combine theater and writing in my career and will be interested in seeing if some of my true love stories might lead to a fictionalized script.


Gerald Fierst can be reached at http://www.geraldfierst.com/

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

This post was sponsored by The Dabbling Mum.

For more articles geared towards authors and writers, check out DM's Writing Center.